Dryness.

I may regret writing this at some point in my life (actually, in a couple of minutes, I think I'll regret it already) but I think I just have to say this.

There are really just days like this when I feel that my life is totally devoid of feeling.

I did the usual stuff; actually, given my lifestyle nowadays, I'd say I did more stuff today that I do most days. I went to school, did some errands, met up with the Kythers and joined their meeting, hung out with Allan, Nikka, Francis and Mars, had really worthwhile conversations...

I mean, given my (relatively) full day, I don't understand why I went home feeling like crap.

My friends keep me up most of the time. No matter how tired or sleepy I may be, they're my instant energy booster -- I just feel the need to be really happy when I'm with them. Wait. No. I think I'm really just happy when I'm with friends. I usually go home happy-tired, after a day spent with them. This is why I don't understand why I'm feeling really, really, really dry right now.

By dry, I mean I feel like I'm totally devoid of emotion. The happiness felt mechanical, the laughter more tiring than sincere.

I know it doesn't have anything to do with the people I'm with. I missed the Kythers so much that it actually hurt seeing them there continuing on with their lives, while I'm here in limbo. And, with the gang, nothing can really go wrong. So, probably, it's probably just me, and I don't know why.